We were told we could go visit him in 5 hours and to get some sleep...so after a few minutes of cleaning and clearing up the room, Randy and I were left alone. You can imagine how emotional we both were at that time. I had just given birth to our perfect little boy, but at the same time we weren't allowed to be with him. We were so scared something else would be found wrong, or his temperature wouldn't go down...or even worse, that his temperature would keep rising causing brain damage etc... I just remember Randy walking over to me in the bed and we both just held each other and had a good cry. We didn't know what to expect, we couldn't sleep knowing the life of our new-born son was so uncertain. We said a prayer (still crying) and tried to get some sleep. A few hours later we had a change of nurse, and she informed us we could go see our little Jacob! They gave us new hospital bracelets and we had one of the NICU nurses escort us to the NICU. We were shocked to see Jacob was all wired and monitored. He had a heart, temperature, and breath monitor, and on his little head he had an IV tube for the antibiotics. Since all his veins were too small everywhere else they had to give him the antibiotics through a vein in his head. He was there for 10 days. Needless to say those 10 days felt like the longest 10 days of my life!
It was really hard to come home empty-handed, but it was even harder to know our little guy was being given some very strong antibiotics. Most of us have been on antibiotics and we know that they are hard on our bodies. We visited Jacob everyday, and I tried to nurse him at least a couple of times a day while he was there. The nurses were so helpful, but at the same time they had a job to do. So when I had been holding him for over an hour they would come and let me know it was time to 'put him back' as they said. It was so hard for me, because I felt like I only had a couple of hours a day to bond with my baby. But we made it though! And we brought him home on July 3rd 2007! It was such a wonderful day! My mom, my sister Priscila and my father in law Kevin were all here at the house. We were so grateful to have them here supporting us, and so grateful we could finally bring our little Jacob home. He has been perfectly healthy ever since, and for that I am eternally thankful! He hasn't had any side effects from the antibiotics(hearing loss was a serious possibility), and he has been growing and developing completely healthy and on target.
Throughout this year, and during those long 10 days we had much needed support from our friends and family. Thank you so much to all of you who called us and wrote us, or texted us and calmed our fears. Thank you all who listened and comforted, to all those who made us laugh, and to those who went out of their way to help us. Thank you all who put our names in the temple, to those who prayed for us, and fasted for us. Thank you so much for your love, support and strength.
I could not imagine my life without Jacob. He has brought me more joy and more love than I ever thought possible. He has taught me about unconditional love, he has taught me to laugh, he has taught me how to be silly and not care what people think. As with any baby, he has taught me patience, and most of all, he has taught me, or rather reminded me that I have a heavenly father who loves me. I feel so inadequate most days, but with Heavenly father's help, we have come so far!
I am so blessed to have such a worthy priesthood holder as a husband. Through all we went through when Jacob was born, Randy was such a steady, calm, and loving force. He is the best dad! He changed Jacob's first diaper, and that is just the type of dad he is. He is not afraid to help, he's not afraid to take care of Jacob or of me.
I just want to end by saying I am grateful for everything we went through, because not only did it bring us closer together as a family, it made us stronger spiritually. It helped us to realize how precious our lives are, and how every minute really does count. I hope we can teach those things to Jacob, and I hope we are able to raise a grateful, thoughtful, loving child. I have a feeling he already is those things naturally, we just have to remind him of that when he's a teenager ;)
Happy Birthday Jacob! We love you so much!